Depression. Obesity. Heart Disease. Fibromyalgia. Alcohol. Drugs. These are just a few of the things I’ve had to deal with. I lived in that long, dark tunnel with no light at the end. The doctors said, “This is your life, get used to it.” I was so sick with pain, anger, and hopelessness. I used to beg God, night after night, “Please, let me go to sleep and die!” Yet, at the same time, I still had a kernel of hope. Maybe, just maybe, something would change. For over 10 yrs. I lived with unrelenting pain and couldn’t care for my children.

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I am originally from the Bay area of California. As a child my home was beyond broken! I started recreational drugs, drinking, and smoking to numb myself throughout my lifetime. As an adult I developed fibromyalgia and traded recreational drugs for prescription drugs. I could always quit the alcohol for years at a time, only to pick up where I left off. I never quit smoking cigarettes. I smoked for 37 years.

I was diagnosed with osteoarthritis. Due to the prescription drugs and alcohol I was never “clear and present”. I was very unhappy and went into a severe depression. I have always had problems sleeping but my insomnia was now off the charts. My average night’s sleep was two to three hours usually drug and alcohol induced. I was in a viscous cycle and getting nowhere. After dropping 12 more pounds I could barely look at myself. With my family’s support I decided I needed to get help. I knew there was a way to do it — even get off the medications I was taking from so called medical doctors. I knew I was going to need help to do it all.

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